We never ate hamburgers.
When my boss asked what we wanted for lunch we’d say, “burgers!”
He’d look at us, and say, “Burgers?! That’s a great idea! And I know a Mexican restaurant that’s really good.”
Our response? “Awesome!” And we’d happily trot off to Señor Taco.
This happened EVERY TIME he’d ask us what we wanted. And when you’re in a dance band (à la Backstreet Boys and NSYNC) for kids, dancing 6 hours a day, you’re always hungry.
After eating my bean and cheese burrito with a side of sour cream for the zillionth time, I never thought twice about that double-double animal style.
No one did.
We never noticed my boss’s cravings outweighed 8 of us “Jumpitz” (that was our group—don’t bother Googling it. Almost every trace was removed from the interwebs for reasons I won’t divulge unless Prosecco is involved).
The Jumpitz, Tori Spelling, Dean McDermott- photo by Amy and Stuart
Seriously, WTF? Did my boss’ charming weatherman spirit (his real-life day job) cast a spell on us? I mean, sure, he was the one that signed our checks– but it wasn’t that.
His “powers” would be a mystery to me for the next decade.
Then one day, while teaching our signature improv class for lawyers I had an AHA-moment!
FINALLY the answer to why burgers were never on the menu and how YOU can use it in your next depo, cross or direct. Whether you’re craving carne asada fries or taking down a shady expert witness- THIS is key to turning the tides to what you want.
We call it an “Improvised Loop and Steer” and it’s the exact technique we teach lawyers to master constructive cross.
Let’s rewind a bit…
When my boss asked what we wanted for lunch we’d say, “burgers!“
He’d look at us, and say, “Burgers?! That’s a great idea! And I know a Mexican restaurant that’s really good. I’d love to take you guys.”
See that?
Step 1: He’d ‘loop’ aka repeat what we said (burgers), which made us feel heard– this is CRITICAL!
Step 2: He’d steer us to a new option with the word, ‘and.’
You can’t do step 2 without step 1. When people feel heard, they’re automatically more open to new ideas, suggestions, or feedback- decreasing conflict and increasing compromise/collaboration.
Whether you’re trying to stay in control during client consults, negotiations, depos, or keep an off-the-rails, smart-ass expert witness in check on cross (or your own witness on direct):
I’m telling you this ‘Improvised Loop + And Steer Method works!
How do we know? We’ve been cross-examined over 1,500 times and have the experience (and verdicts) to prove it.
You can do this too. But there’s a hitch…
There’s one word that will derail your negotiation, depo or cross so fast– before you know it, you’re eating a Royale with Cheese instead of that Chimichanga you wanted.
New or seasoned lawyer, I guarantee you use this no-go word ALL. THE. TIME.
This is the fun, on-your-feet training that makes ‘Looping and Steering’ second nature.
Click HERE to get confident, stay in control of your goal, and transform obstacles into opportunities… Adios Señor Taco!